Pick Me Up
What is the one word or phrase that immediately cheers you up when you hear it?
The phone rings. I answer. Any response that isn’t a call centre brings a beaming smile to my idiot face.
I try not to be unreasonable. I try not to be rude. The callers themselves are only doing what they have to do to earn a living, like the rest of us. But when you’ve already had seven calls this week about your phone line, is it unnatural to tell the eighth to go away? Particularly when they all have that uncanny knack of catching you in the shower…with a mouthful…just as you’ve put your feet up and found the page in your book.
They also, without fail, ask if they’re speaking to Mista Merkly – Mikely – Meckly – which isn’t altogether their fault given it’s not an easy name to guess. (It rhymes with treacle, in case you’re wondering.) But it is an added irritation, as is the Mr. OK, I’ve got a reasonably deep voice, but still… I have been known to say, No you’re not, he’s dead, but for all the difference it made, I might as well not have bothered. An acquaintance of mine answered the usual And how are you today? by telling the man she was dying, but it barely interrupted the spiel.
So anyway, when I answer the phone and someone says Hi, mum – or variations on that up to and including Hello, old lady, depending on which of my children it is, what mood they’re in and how much they feel like bagging me out…When that’s the response, it makes my day.