Weekly challenge: It’s all as inspiring as a cracked bell

So I’m sitting here feeling about as uninspired as it’s possible to be without lapsing into catatonia, and you’re asking what inspires me.

All I can see when I look around is death, doom, disaster, mismanagement, corruption, bomb strikes, football and sex – as in who’s getting it or not getting it with whom, where, why, and the more sordidly inappropriate the better. So storylines that don’t revolve around some form of moral or physical chaos begin to look like fairytales, which I was never hooked on even as a child. ‘Happily ever after’ back then smacked of the princess becoming a domestic goddess, and I couldn’t imagine anything more deathly boring, although I never said, not wanting to appear unnatural. To the modern wannabe princess, I guess it means diamonds, yachts, A-listing, jet setting, hobnobbing with the rich and famous and as much cosmetic surgery as you fancy – not that I’m a cynic or anything.

Today’s headline on my homepage says Butt lifts, fame and knife fights. The photo of the two erstwhile reality ‘stars’ accompanying this gem shows two women flaunting more silicone and Botox than the human body was designed to accommodate, and my immediate question would be What were they thinking‽ But as I’ll never be able to get inside their well-moisturised skins to understand them, such is the chasm between us, they don’t stir in me the irresistible urge to weave them into the next Great Australian Novel.

Neither does the teenage girl posing with the endangered African mammals she managed to bag on a hunting trip in Zimbabwe.

Maybe I’m just too old appreciate the rambunctious energy and variety of modern living. I’m usually inspired by what makes people tick, but it’s all starting to sound a bit tinny.


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15 Responses to Weekly challenge: It’s all as inspiring as a cracked bell

  1. elainecanham says:

    Oh, bugger them. Keep going, inspiration will strike – you’ll spill your coffee like that girl in the cafe in Rickmansworth in the Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, and the secret of the great Australian novel will be made plain to you. Bit of Nevil Shute, anyone?

    • …and then I’ll pay off all my children’s mortgages and we’ll all live happily ever after floating on a sea of Botox! Good thing I don’t really aspire to the great Australian novel, though. Great Anywhere novels sell a measly few copies, mainly to the literati, because they’re usually boring as batshit.

      • elainecanham says:

        Depends what you count as a GAN. Pride and Prejudice? Treasure Island? Rebecca? Wait a minute…that’s it. Think of something the literati would absolutely hate, and then write that. Oh, it’s been done. Hmm.

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  3. Helen,
    Here in the US our home pages show the same inane – insane – bloody crap. (Did I just lapse into Australian with “bloody” when I was referring to news of the day?)
    Here on the other side of the world we also have a cracked bell. We call it the Liberty Bell. If one is a pessimist, looking at the mess we’ve become lately, it’s easy to conclude it will never ring gain. If one is an optimist “Liberty” is the operational word and applied to our ATTITUDE it can still ring loud and clear. Try putting winter aside and imagine yourself on a spring day looking out over the gorgeous scene at the top of your page. The inspiration WILL return – along with your wit and wisdom.

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  6. bkpyett says:

    Love your cracked bell analogy!

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