Remember when you wrote down the first thought you had this morning? Great. Now write a post about it.
Do your really expect me to sparkle-arkle with coherent thoughts first thing in the morning? Waking up is more a gradual seepage of awareness – hmm, yes, well… Being… Body… Window…Light… You think I’m going to snap to with the mental co-ordination to write that down? Even if I had a notebook beside the bed, which I don’t.
There are, of course, the occasional mornings when you wake up fully alert to the previous day’s drama or the all-consuming dread of a problem too urgent to be blurred by sleep – but that isn’t the case, at the moment, and thank goodness for that.
I do admit, though, that sorting the morning’s first impressions is slightly more complicated than usual. The window is in the wrong place, the sounds are different, the clock on the wrong side of the bed… All because I’m stuck in Sydney, while They go over my heart with the cardiological equivalent of a fine-tooth comb, to decide whether it contributed to my inglorious collapse on Christmas Eve.
So far, I’ve had an appointment with the cardiologist, an angiogram (no blocked arteries, which was probably a big surprise to everyone), and a 24-hour heart monitor which involved lots of sticky bits plonked on my chest, a recorder slung around my neck and a rubber-banded spaghetti-lump of wires tucked under my shirt, looking like an unsightly growth in the region of my navel. And now I have to sit and twiddle my thumbs waiting for the results and another visit to the cardiologist, while the bills piles up in my mail box (fortunately a PO box, not the street variety where by now they’d be scattered to the four winds, saturated and eaten by snails). I’m also missing the best of the beach. Not happy.
But it’s all in a good cause. Wouldn’t be fair to my family to follow my basic instinct on these matters and refuse to know – and I guess I’d be a bit edgy as well, forever wondering if I was a walking time bomb. Life’s too interesting to give it up now. But if They start messing with my lifestyle, I won’t be in the least amused…